"Can you make me look skinnier?"

"How many pictures have you taken so far?"

"Ooooh, I have a great idea for a picture, come see!"



ok, go!

"Did you get any good ones?"




My answer is always, with a straight face, in all seriousness..."Nope I only take crap photos."

A couple have looked at me sideways.

"dont worry she can just photoshop that right"

"that's a serious camera (or lens) right there" (would you like me to show up with a toy camera instead?)

"you must love getting free food at these things" (like I really get a chance to enjoy the food!? I'm also lucky to get something edible!)

"so how many megapixels does that thing have?"

"You photoshop out my wrinkles right?"

"Oh wow - Ive got EXACTLY the same camera"
(that one stumbled me for a few seconds, then I thought its similar to the comment "so how many megapixels? Oh! Mine is more than that, does that mean mine can take better photos?"... does IT have the training/experience I have? no? Well possibly not then )

"Love those engagement photos you took, you must have a nice camera..."

LOL I get this one all the time, usually some Uncle or something. I always say "not yet" And the shock that comes over their faces! Then I just laugh a little.

"I wouldve taken heaps but I realised I hadnt put the memory card in!"
hehehehe

nah

+100000000000000000

"can you get rid of my double chin"?

The Electric Slide.... Can we retire that one yet?

Ok... my thing is... how do all those people know how to do that dance? It's almost like when everyone in a musical starts randomly singing the same song and you wonder how they all know the words. Because do they play that dumb song any where else than at a wedding? So how many weddings does one have to go to, to be able to know that dance by heart!? I mean... I don't even know how to dance to that song.

Not to mention that it's pretty much the most annoying thing ever...

Disclaimer: I'm not a wedding photographer....yet. But I've attended weddings as a guest.

I have no idea if this is common at weddings or not, but....Baby Got Back. Watching the mother of the bride (my friend) dance to that..... If it is common and I hear it at every wedding I shoot......

I just realized...we don't have a green/sick/throwing up emoticon here. We can use one at the top of a thread, but not in a post. Matt!!!!

I love walking up to the annoying uncle Bob's, with their 70-300 black zooms (the sliding f-stop kind), when I've got the 70-200 on, with the lens hood attatched, and telling them....

"Mine's bigger!"

He usually spends the rest of the wedding zoomed all the way at 300, and gets almost no scene setting images. Just to show me his lens gets closer than mine.

Then we pull out the MacBook Pro with the slide show and show him everything he missed.

"OMG! You just missed the FUNNIEST shot!!"

"Hurry... she's on the toilet! Go take a photo of THAT!"

"Is this here camera that I got a good starter camera?"
(Almost always followed by:)
"Can you show me how to use it real quick?"

When I did video as a teenager, we had a monitor set up on a table and at Sunday weddings especially there was always a guy that would come up and say, "Can you get the game on there?"

They just couldn't bear not being able to see "the game."

"I was thinking we could stand on the balcony with the water behind us. Would that make a good picture?"

"There's a gazebo here. Wouldn't that be a pretty spot for some photos?"

"Ohhh....the flower girl is on the dance floor. Ohhhh...the flower girl is [whatever]."

I don't mind it at all when Uncle Bob has a newer (better) cameral than I do; my lenses are always better and I know my pictures are just from watching him (or her) shoot, usually. But I do hate it when Uncle Bob notices that he has a newer camera and comes up to me bragging and asking when I'm going to upgrade.

I've only shot one wedding on my own but I've been an assistant at others and the thing I hate the most is when a random family member decides that right now is a good time to get some family photos. We had a woman bug us for an entire wedding to get a good photo of her family. We were like, "Lucky for you, we specialize in portraiture, here's our card for a family session..." HaHa.

ughh! This has to be one of my top ones!

This isn't really annoying but kind of funny... a few times I've had guests ask "so how do you know the couple?" Then when I tell them they hired me "Oh, you must be really good then"

These are more annoying (usually from someone on the sidelines):

"Hey why do you have that in the background?"
"Hey you know you have them in the SHADE? Why don't you move them over right here where it's nice and sunny?"

grrrrrrrrrr these are all good ones. I hate that silly little bridesmaid that says "you have to take THIS photo. I really wanted one like that and my photog didn't do it"(and then she pouts)

and of course its some sure cheesy and cliche. GRRR The ring of bouquets around the brides head, classic bm requested shot.

....I can't believe some people.....ok I can but really?! OMG

I hate it when someone at the reception says "oh not me.. don't take my photo!" smiling and then totally tries to get out of my way anytime they see me. I am trying to cover the *event* people!
Or... this one is more subtle, but I feel like I have caught it a couple of different times.. your at the reception and there is this vibe of... omg, she's STILL taking photos??!! Uh.. * yeah * !!

or here is another annoying situation as opposed to comment.. you meet with bride and groom, they love your stuff.. *particularly* the bride and groom shots after formals before reception (time with just them and photographer), they ooh and aah, and it is pretty much what sells them and makes them book you.. fast forward to day of wedding and they act like they are being put out by your suggestion to get some of the shots that they liked or wanted in the first place.

whew! Vent over!

If Im doing guest photos at reception and someone says "not me! no!", I tell them quietly that if they dont let me take one nice photo of them, I will follow them allllllll night.. usually works But really, their loss really and its not as if I will remember their face

"Why are you wearing two different shoes?"











What? Doesn't every photographer hear that one?

UGH, that one drives me CRAZY!!!!!!!!! I want to just blurt out, sure for an additional $50 an hour

"Wow, this is a fun hobby you have"

"Did you remember to take pictures of x,y,z.....?"

"So, that looks like expensive equipment............do you mind if I take a look at it?"

"How many pictures have you taken today?"

That makes as much sense as: wow, that was a good meal, you must have some really nice pots.

+1

+100000000

I hate Brick House more.

I also hate when people say "Did you get that?"

I always say no. I actually say no to everything...

"Taken any good shots?"

"nope"

"Do I look ok?"

"nope"

During massive family group photos:

One will ask: "can I be in the back?"

"Yeah, Me too..."
"Me too..."
"Me too..."
"Me too..."
"Me too..."
"Me too..."
"Me too..."
"Me too..."
"Me too..."
"Me too..."
"Me too..."
"Me too..."
"Me too..."
"Me too..."
"Me too..."

this isnt something i hear - but its something that happens at every wedding. people walk up and do a stupid pose and expect me to take their picture. and when i say stupid, i mean stupid.

drives me bonkers.

"How are they coming out?"

"Have you eaten yet?" <-- I actually like this one!

"How about one with the bouquet now?" from a bridesmaid

"Are we finished?" from someone in the bridal party

"Ugh, it's the paparazzi" from a guest

And last but not least...

My husband went to the bar to get a drink of water real quick and the MOG was seated there and asks him, "Oh, are you off duty now?"

*shrug

Oh my gosh. I've gotten that one at every wedding so far this year. And it's always so ugly! Maybe it's cause I hate it so I don't even try. It never makes it into the gallery.

" I just have one more shot for you to take"

That one I get all the time. I have to tell them, Im here for the night....dont worry.

"Oh my AA batteries died, do you have any I can use?" I gotten this several times and everytime I say NOPE even though I keep spares. One less person annoying the crap out of me with thier P&S.

Odd one but I get the "have you eaten yet" a lot. I NEVER eat at weddings because I am really self concious about eating in front of other people (even when I was thiner). I am a fat chick and I can just hear people think "gosh, the fat chick photographer is eating instead of taking photos". It makes me even more self-concious when a person asks me if I have eaten and I say no and that I never do at weddings. Yeah, I got some issues...

Hilarious.



I'm going to use gaffer's tape to cover up the make and model of my camera before I run into this. You can buy a 40D at Costco and all I've got is the 30D, so I must not be getting as good of pictures.

We must have the same camera... lol

I always say, "Haven't you heard about the recall? Lots of reports of the camera corrupting images. As a wedding photographer I can't take that chance, but I can see why you would keep it for family and friends photos. I'll wait until they fix the firmware before I upgrade."

You know he goes straight home and starts googling his camera model and problems, and with the internet now, you know he is going to find at least half a dozen reports.

Not to completely hijack this thread, but does anyone have an example of this type of photo b/c I have yet to see it in action and so I know what not to shoot at a wedding!

For those who use the Fong Lightsphere: "can you drink beer out of that?"

For some reason I always explain what it actually is; I should try being more of a smarta$$ about it.

YES! Why are people so un-original...???

LMAO.

The best comment i've heard in relation to the fong was when the top popped off my light sphere cloud and i got "The tupper... cap... uhhhh... your hat came off, the one on your camera."

I nearly died...

"don't you just luv digital?"

I say, "f$#k no, i hate it"

they say why? its so easy.

I say, my point exactly.....
_________________________

you are shooting film too..why?

-because the couple hired me to add into the mix.

_________________________

my bride:

you know, this wedding went so smooth... im thinking on getting into wedding planning..
what do you think?

_________________________





I could write a novel on this... so could you, just title each chapter based on the number of year(s) you have been doing this...

I like you."No, it's a flash condom. Would you drink beer out of a condom? Wait, don't answer that...."

ohhhhh i so agree! i did a huge wedding last september and i specifically discussed this wtih the B&G, i said, lets have some alone time after the ceremony so we can get some really good romantic shots with out everyone pulling at you and tugging. they were totally in agreement and on the day, after the ceremony.... they gave me 5 minutes.....

The ones that really annoy me are the constant complainers. Especially the continous droning on about it being "too hot" or "too bright" or there are too many bugs. Well well...who chose to have the outdoor wedding at 1 O' Clock in the afternoon, in July, in South Georgia?

+1 on that little paranoia, I try not to eat in public either for the same reasons.

these are all HILARIOUS! Mike and I have been cracking up all morning reading this thread!

I thought of one:

"so, what do you do the other six days of the week?"